June 2011 – Page 2 – Blessings on the Journey

Is laughter the best medicine? I’m not talking about giggles or polite laughter at a joke or a reference that’s not really funny but you’re supposed to insert said appropriate laughter here. I’m talking for real, serious, tears streaming down the face laughter.

Earlier this semester the lovely Nick Jeffries from Camp Chestnut Ridge came and did some great team building stuff with our campus ministry. We did a mirroring exercise where we all stood in a circle and we’re supposed to be copying another person in the circle, so let’s say I was supposed to be copying Jane, Jane is copying Chris, Chris is copying Malcolm, Malcolm is copying Lisa and Lisa is copying me. It only takes one person to start copying a random thing and people are cracking up. Or at least people like me are cracking up. There’s something that is absolutely contagious about laughter and being silly that if we let our guards down even in the most stressful of times in the semester, we will readily and eagerly “go there” and crack up for awhile.

Tonight Mike and I went to see the movie Bridesmaids (yes, insert all sorts of cautions, parental controls, and other red flags here). I saw it a conference a week or so ago and laughed so hard I cried, multiple times. In telling Mike about the movie, I couldn’t figure out if the movie was really funny or if merely watching it with a theater full of laughing people and joining in laughing at the movie but also laughing at their reactions and raucous laughter was the thing that made it so hilarious. After now seeing the movie twice (judge away, judge away), I definitely think it’s both. This isn’t just some gross out, perverted, lame-o, insert fomulaic jokes here kind of movie. Yes, there are some pretty “wild” (what word can you really put there?) scenes, but there’s also a good story as well. A realistic story even. Or at least more realistic than a lot of the crazy stuff out there. The movie has heart.

But just as much as the movie has a hilarious and edgy heart, it’s also a beautiful thing to just be sitting in a theater with a room full of laughing people. And this isn’t just normal self-conscious laughter, this is I don’t care who’s around I am laughing outloud and for real. So much laughter. There was one guy that was laughing so hard and loud that several of us just died laughing listening to him. Seriously, several of us began to laugh so hard we were crying just because it was like this domino affect just listening and joining in on laughter.

There is something special about laughter. Smiles. Seeing them. Hearing it. Sharing it. It can lighten a moment even in the most darkest and trying of times. It can bring people together that don’t even have words to speak to one another. It can break the ice on an awkward date. It can be that camraderie in a scary situation, a nervous interview, or that spontaneous a ha moment when it all comes together. It can even be the laughter that springs forth out of you randomly when someone is calling you on your stuff or providing a truthful but real revelation on what’s up in your life.

Beyond just turning that frown upside down, laughter is a uniter. Not laughter or happiness at the misfortune of others – well maybe some of that in movies and America’s Funniest Home Videos. What’s special is that contagious, joyous, surprise of laughter.

There are a multitude of youtube videos on laughter – from laughter yoga with the lovely with the hilarious John Cleese to all sorts of songs and chains and challenges. Check them out. Do what it takes to laugh. Everybody needs those moments of abs hurting laughter in the midst of our sometimes crazy world. If Bridesmaids is not your thing try some knock knock jokes or going to a comedy club or even laughing at the hilarity that can sometimes be our lives. Laugh long and laugh loud and don’t care a bit about who’s watching or listening. (Even if that means snorting or guffawing in the most endearing of manners.)

I like that in the movie, Megan tells Annie that she’s got to grab on to her life. Instead of just letting it knock her down, she’s got to have some fight left in her to claim it as her own. I know, I know. I shouldn’t try to wax eloquent about the movie at this point. However, if you have seen the movie, hopefully this song will make you laugh. If you haven’t seen it. Very cheesily, hold on to one more day. Laugh. Outloud. Break free from whatever chains. Know that there is someOne who can break the chains and wants to laugh with us every day, even in the midst of the muck and the mire.

Do you ever wonder what people think when they see you? I’m not completely just talking about visual judgments here, but the whole shebang. It’s just funny to me to think about how we are each perceived and how close to the mark that is.

One of the students and I walked over to the campus Starbucks earlier today to talk about seminary and candidacy and all that is wonderful and crazy about heading into ministry in the United Methodist Church. It was a fun conversation and I’m excited about his journey. What was funny to me is that one of the folks we met along the way, that I know pretty well, didn’t even speak to me or seem to recognize me. Now, I must say, that since there’s no meetings today and I’m not anticipating having to look too terribly nice, I’m in jeans and a short sleeved shirt with no make up. You could call this one of my uniforms. What is hilarious is that when I’m dressed nicely with my make up on, I’m recognized immediately, but in my “natural” state, not so much. Now there are pros and cons about being recognized and pros and cons about blending in. I just think it’s funny to think about.

I mentioned this to some of the students at lunch and one very nicely and graciously and probably a little untruthfully, said – “What? You look exactly the same.” God bless the young. We were having some conversation about the upcoming school year and getting ready for Welcome Week and the first few weeks of classes and how we need to plan and prepare and get rocking this summer so that we show the very best of Winthrop Wesley those first few weeks. In other words, we’re going to put on our nice clothes and make up and rock this thing. Or as my Ganny would say, we’re going to put our “face” on. Thinking about it – it’s the truth. When do I clean up and make sure everything looks nice – when someone’s coming over, when there’s a board meeting, at the beginning of the school year. When do we put out fresh pine straw and make sure the outside of the building looks good – Orientations and the beginning of the school year. When do I actually consider wearing a suit or ironing that dress – Annual Conference, a district meeting, or some other professional gathering. When do our congregations particular dress up – Easter, Christmas, graduation, the big days. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with celebrating or dressing up for dinner or actually using the fine china every now and then. (Come to think of it – we have NEVER used ours and that is a sad, sad thing. Maybe we should plan a big dinner sometime soon or at least use the stuff. I don’t know why we even registered for those tea cups. My Lord.) Reality is that I think sometimes we need those occasions or deadlines to get geared up and do something. Although I know that I need to exercise more and stop eating all of these delicious cookies from Lell’s, I also keep thinking to myself – I’ll start tomorrow or maybe one day when I get a bike and ride it to work or maybe before bathing suit season. And yet, we’re at bathing suit season and I’m thinking, I don’t really have to wear a bathing suit, right? Or maybe I can scratch the bikini this year and actually go for the “Mom” suit. (You know the kind I’m talking about, don’t even try to deny it.) Sometimes without an imminent deadline, we languish where we are and don’t make the extra effort to get our “stuff” together. So as much as I in some ways don’t like being recognized and it’s nice not to be “seen” all the time, it’s also a good reminder that we’ve got to keep it moving and keep it flowing not just on the high traffic, big deal, main event kind of times, but maybe at least a trickle of keeping it hospitable, welcoming, genuine and open all the time. You never know whose going to walk into your congregation at what time or who you’re going to welcome to your door. You don’t know if today’s going to be the day at Starbucks that you meet someone that is going to rock your socks off and be that missing piece to some ministry idea or ministry team or whatever for your congregation. I’m not saying we’re not authentic – and I’m certainly not saying that I’m going to suddenly dress up for Wesley each day, but I am saying that we’ve got to be aware of what the world sees. We’ve got to be aware of how we’re perceived. We’ve got to be aware of the image that we create.

While at lunch there were three professors in the restaurant with us and one of them who comes to our Faculty-Staff lunches looked over and smiled and waved as the students and I were discussing Nicaragua and the upcoming school year. That’s what I want these folks to see – students engaged and excited and brainstorming – not just about their schoolwork or their majors but also about their vocational journeys, their worlds – all the fun and mess and real life. We want the world to see all of who we are – not just the Sunday morning shiny with the great hair, outfit, and full face, but also the struggles, the tears, the frustrations and everything in between. So the challenge – put our best foot forward – true – but be real. What is your image of yourself? What do you think the world sees? What do you think God sees? How are we called to be in the world? Do we need a big fancy event to throw on some nice clothes or use the good china? Who or what has helped to define how you see yourself?

“Our deepest calling is to grow into our own authentic self-hood, whether or not it conforms to some image of who we ought to be. As we do so, we will not only find the joy that every human being seeks–we will also find our path of authentic service in the world.” – Parker Palmer

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm. ¹ You have searched me, LORD, and you know me. ² You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. ³ You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. ⁴ Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely. ⁵ You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. ⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. ⁷ Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? ⁸ If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. ⁹ If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, ¹⁰ even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. ¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” ¹² even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. ¹³ For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. ¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. ¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.