So I was at a campus ministry conference last week and was having loads of fun when I suddenly began not feeling well. Thinking that this sprung from staying up too late and working too hard (yes, we do work in the summers) I skipped lunch and slept and made it back in time for some small groups. Still not feeling well, I headed back to the dorm room at 5 pm and went back to sleep. 5 pm to sleep, do you say? Crazy? I know.
Somewhere in the middle of that, I had a very scary dream where I thought I was having a seizure and couldn’t breathe and felt completely and utterly out of control. The next thing I remember is being on the floor of the dorm room and thinking hmmm….I’m laying on carpet. I crawled back up into bed (oh should have said that the beds were lofted – you gotta love dorm rooms) and then later blew my nose only to find that I was blowing out blood. Yes, squeamish people, this is not the blog for you. If you’re looking for rainbows and leprechauns they are not here. Well, after seeing the blood, I turned on the light in the room and I realized that there was blood all over my face and in my hair because my nose and lip were busted. Some dream! In the midst of this I got my phone and hopeful that morning was soon to arrive, I was saddened to find that it was 12:08 am. The good news is that some campus ministry friends were still awake and hanging out downstairs where I knew there was Tylenol. After a quick run downstairs to them where I’m sure I looked like a mess and crazy because I’m telling crazy stories about dreams of seizures and I’ve fallen out of my bed and I have strange bruises on my arms, I’m back upstairs calling my mom in the middle of the night trying to figure out what in the heck is happening to me.
A very, very wise person called campus police and just as my mom was praying for guards at my door, they literally showed up. I know I must have looked a mess because they quickly unbunked my bed and asked if they could call the paramedics. The paramedics came and checked me out and everything looked good. They asked if I wanted to come with them and thinking that I was finally starting to feel sleepy, I said no, but then I started feeling nauseous and hot again, and so yes, I have now taken a ride in an ambulance. Oh my even in the middle of the night, that is embarassing.
Several blood tests later, I’m checking out pretty well. I think all the ER people thought I was just a crazy girl from South Carolina. Which is true. But somehow in the midst of this the doctor began to listen to my story, and to this “dream” that I had about a seizure and she ran a muscle enzyme test that showed that I had most likely had a seizure. Good to know that I haven’t just started randomly falling out of beds.
So this very wise doctor then does a CT Scan and sees a suspicious place on the scan so decides to do an MRI and lo and behold just before 7 am on Saturday morning I am in the middle of Winchester, Virginia hearing that I may have a brain tumor. Anyone see that one coming? And then here comes my very own McDreamy. Actually it took him several hours and I wouldn’t have described him as Mcanything – steamy or otherwise, but he was very nice and reassuring even in the midst of hearing the whole can’t drive 6 months after a seizure and all that jazz.
So where does that leave me? It leaves me with a waiting game and a fighting game. I get to do a functional MRI in the next couple of days to see how close this low grade tumor is to the extrafabulous part of my brain that helps me to function and then sometime next week I hear that we’ll get to know what the plan of action is. For me, I already know what that is. I’m going to love, I’m going to fight, I’m going to cry, I’m going to feel, I’m going to get mad, I’m going to laugh, and I’m probably going to have some headaches.
I never took the time to write a blog before. Ha ha. But I’m thinking now’s as good a time as any to start. Will post more as I figure things out. Thanks for all of the prayers! You can ask questions, but we don’t have many answers. I think God likes questions though so have at it!