Just last week I was talking about the beautiful weather and now we’ve been in a week of rain. I was listening to Carole King’s “Beautiful” earlier and in it she talks about reflecting in how you look, how you feel on the inside. We know the research about how even when you’ve had a really cruddy day, there’s something about smiling, something about laughing, that can make a dark day seem a little brighter. Turn that frown upside down, if you will. If all of us reflect the love that we feel than what a world that would be. I don’t think that means we walk around like Stepford Wives or people smiling and fake all the time. Far from it. I hope that it means that in the midst of us being real, we realize how blessed we are and how thankful we should be, and that the joy inside that we feel will bubble out from us. If we are living as grace-filled people that have been given this new life, the very breath we breathe, than that should be reflected in the love and thanksgiving that we show the world. So on this very cloudy yucky day, may we be thankful for both the little things we sometimes take for granted (running water, flowers, food, clothing) and the big things (getting to go to school, opportunities to learn and grow, a gift of wisdom, thought, discourse, dialogue). Let’s rock it on from the inside to the outside and back again! Not fake it to make it, but let our guards down to let the laughter and smiles of our hearts flow.
Carole King’s, “Beautiful”
You’ve got to get up every morning with a smile on your face
Some beautiful smiling faces!
And show the world all the love in your heart
Then people gonna treat you better
You’re gonna find, yes, you will
That you’re beautiful as you feel
Waiting at the station with a workday wind a-blowing
I’ve got nothing to do but watch the passers-by
Mirrored in their faces I see frustration growing
And they don’t see it showing, why do I?
You’ve got to get up every morning with a smile on your face
And show the world all the love in your heart
Then people gonna treat you better
Some smiling, silly faces!
You’re gonna find, yes, you will
That you’re beautiful as you feel
I have often asked myself the reason for THE sadness
In a world where tears are just a lullaby
If there’s any answer, maybe love can end the madness
Maybe not, oh, but we can only try
You’ve got to get up every morning with a smile on your face
And show the world all the love in your heart
Then people gonna treat you better
You’re gonna find, yes, you will
That you’re beautiful as you feel
The text for this past Sunday is one of my favorites. I feel like I say that just about every week though so it’s a little redundant. It was a long one – John 4:5-42. It’s hard for people’s minds not to wander with such a chunk of text but how can you break these things up? It’s the story of the Samaritan woman at the well which is a familiar one to a lot of us.
Every week this semester, Josh, Adrienne and I have been playing basketball in the West Center (the gym on campus) on Tuesdays and Thursdays when time and no meetings have allowed. It’s two against one and we go to 21 by 1’s and 2’s for a typical 3 pointer. The best we’ve ever done against Josh is 15 to his 21. The worst is 1. Sad times. Josh definitely takes a healthy joy in blocking my shots after me blocking his through out my growth spurt in high school. After one of these lovely work out sessions, we went back to Wesley and I was beyond thirsty. I asked them if we had anything besides water in the building. I’m not a complete water hater. Well, actually I kind of am. I just don’t really like it. How spoiled and snotty is that? True. Anyway, there were 3 or 4 students in the office at the time and we had a long, serious conversation over how I say the word, “water.” Why do they have to hate on their campus minister this way?
Apparently, maybe due to my strong Southern roots, say something along the lines of “warter.” When I should be saying “wa-ter.” Whatever. At the time of this conversation on Tuesday I had no idea that the text coming up was the one with the Samaritan woman at the well. I pick texts along time in advance and don’t always remember where we are. So on Sunday as I’m trying to read this text in front of a congregation and than later on in front of the students, I felt more than conspicuous and nervous about saying it – oh about a dozen times. I was so concerned about the pronouncement and trying to get the words right, that it would have been easy to miss the whole point of the text.
Some of us that may not always talk right or look right or use the right scripture or dress a certain way or do a certain job or belong to the special club or organization, we may sometimes be afraid to speak up and be real. In this week’s Neue This Week, they had a post from Relevant Magazine called Church Members Anonymous. It spoke about a pastor visiting Alcoholics Anonymous with some friends. It talks about some of the similarities he saw between AA and the church and the honesty he encountered in this meeting. He talks about being real and these moments of personal confession and being active participants in our faith community.
This Samaritan woman didn’t show up at the well for an AA meeting, but Jesus made no bones about knowing exactly who she was and what was happening in her life. The disciples walk up later and they can’t believe he was talking with someone from Samaria, much less a woman, and they didn’t even know about her husband history. If she were a college basketball team, she wouldn’t be the one that people would pick to go all the way in a go spread the Good News and people are going to listen to you kind of way. And yet, this little Cinderella story had the energy – she went around and rallied the people and told them about this man who could be the Messiah. She might not have been the one anyone would pick to do it, but her sharing about this man that knew her better than anyone got people out to meet the One she spoke of. In verse 39 it says, “Many Samaritans from that city believed in him because of the woman’s testimony.” She got them there just by sharing her story, her interaction with this man who told her everything she had ever done. And then they saw it for themselves and believed. “It is no longer because of what you said that we believe, for we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this is truly the Savior of the world.”
She had this interaction. She had this experience. She felt this grace and had to share it.
I love it. It was never really the big shot teachers or the intidating people that none of us think we can live up to, but regular folks just like me and you that just spread this thing like wild fire.
A really, really old song that I think fits this well and one that I always think of with this text is Sierra’s “No Stone to Throw.” I know that is hugely old school Christian music and showing my age. I get that. But some of the verses say:
I’ve got no stone to throw,
No ax to grind,
I look in Maggie’s life,
And I see mine.
I see somebody searchin’ for somethin’,
A little love and understandin’,
And the longer I know the Lord the more I know,
I’ve got no stone to throw.
I don’t think any of us would get away with much in the face of Jesus. It’s like a kid caught with his/her hand in the cookie jar. Or with crumbs on his/her shirt trying to cover up the evidence. None of us has any stones to throw.
God can use any of us to spread the Gospel. None of us has messed up too much or for too long. None of us has won the perfection award for 10 years running. If we are honest, like at that AA meeting, we know that all of us struggle and mess up at times. Realizing that justifying grace that this Teacher, this man is speaking to me and is including and accepting me, is a big deal. And then we keep moving towards that repentance and renewal.
The thing about that justifying grace is not just that it leads us to sanctifying grace or in other words, moving closer and closer to living in right relationship with God, but it’s something we’ve got to share. There’s an urgency there to share what we have seen and touched and know. Just like this woman, we don’t have to do this all by ourselves. She just shared her testimony and the people’s interaction with Jesus did the rest. She just opened her mouth and told the world.
I agree with the AA story that what the world wants to see is people being real. They want to know that this is available for them too, not just a select few.
My challenge this week to the students and to me is that we intentionally pray for 5 things.
1. a family member (this one should be relatively easy, but hey you never know – it could be hard)
2. a friend (this one should definitely be easy. they’re your friend for goodness sake)
3. a broken relationship (when I described this to the students I literally break my hands together showing something breaking – this is a wound or something that hasn’t been resolved and forgiveness found, this is something that still needs some healing)
4. someone you’d least like to pray for (when I started this list was their someone that came to your mind that you were like – heck no, I do not want to pray for that person? that’s who we challenge you to pray for)
5. the lost among us (even down here in the crazy South, there are people who haven’t heard the Gospel, or at least not as it directly relates to YOUR life and YOUR experience with God – how are we sharing that? who are we sharing this living water with?)
Will that be hard this week? Probably so. Do we have to have a certain degree or knowledge to say the words? Nope. Do we even have to pronounce the words all in the most correct way? No. But I have a sneaky suspicion that intentionally praying for these folks may open our eyes to some other things around us and ways we can be in prayer and sharing in real and mighty and tangible ways with our neighbors. Are we willing to surrender a bit to the Spirit some of our time and energy and resources to see where this will lead? Are we willing to drop everything like she did to go and tell people?
Food for thought or should I say, living water for thought. And for prayer hopefully.
Right now my mom and dad and aunt and uncle are at my grandparent’s in the big metropolis of Greeleyville. It’s been over a year since my Ganny died and close to a decade since my Gandaddy died and it’s now time to start dismantling some of the home they created. I don’t really like dismantling used in this context, but in the next couple months as family begins to decide what heirloom or furniture or keepsake goes where, it feels a little like that.
My mom called a little while ago and was asking about some of these pieces and what was going where and although I know that we can’t keep the house exactly like it was forever, there’s a part of me now that can’t imagine it any other way. So I was laying in my bed, pondering what home means and admittedly crying – call me a sissy – yes I cry at series finales, heck sometimes just regular tv shows – and I realized that I could be laying there all night if I didn’t get up and try to write this out.
Growing up as a preacher’s kid, you move to a lot of different places over the years. We had amazing church families and we always managed to make parsonages home. You can do a lot with pictures, lamps, and other odds and ends. I can’t imagine my life though with out Ganny’s. I seriously can’t.
The very first Christmas we spent out in Greeleyville, was my first Christmas. So the story goes, there was no heat and the wind was whistling up through the cracks in the floors and the walls. Apparently everybody slept in sleeping bags together on the floor and Mom kept looking into the crib in the night to make sure I hadn’t frozen.
It wasn’t fancy. It wasn’t all dolled up, but it was family together. It was love being shared. To say we spent a inexplicable amount of time there is true. Whether being dropped off as mom and dad led a youth retreat or when Caleb was born, (Josh and I had chicken pox), we weren’t there just for holidays and milestones but everything in between. It was our safe place when we were children and always a running joke that if the end of the world came, we knew we had a place to go because no one was going to come looking for anyone in Williamsburg County. We’ve talked about many a dream we’ve had and no matter what was on the outside whether monsters or wolves, a la our fear of Scar Face from Wilderness Family fame, we were protected in that house.
As I think about us packing things up over the next few months and disbursing things throughout the family, I begin to go over each room in my mind and what I love about it. Even the most random thing can be so dear.
Before Gandaddy died, their room was upstairs. I’ll never forget her closet of bathrobes or the huge basket of makeup she kept in the top drawer of the upstairs bathroom (that took forever to build, much less put a bathtub in. Still to this day, I’ve never seen someone with that much makeup in one place. Everything was in tip top clean Ganny shape. Make up in the top drawer with the lipstick worn down in a way that I can’t even describe but I’ve only seen her do. Her brush, mirror and comb were in the next drawer. I’m telling you – neat and orderly – no matter what.
Ganny liked her cleanliness, even in the midst of Gandaddy’s “hunting lodge.” We heard a lot about crumbs, putting coasters down and not putting our feet on coffee tables and a whole heck of a lot about germs. “Dog” germs, “cat” germs, “school” germs. When Ganny would give us baths as children, she would wash our faces and say that she was cleaning the “dirt beads” around our necks that we had missed. As a child, I honestly did believe that she could see a dirt necklace right there if I didn’t wash up well enough.
I remember watching Dallas and Dynasty and all the CBS soaps – The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful and her two favorites that are now off the air – As the World Turns and not Guiding Light, but The Guiding Light as she would call it. I had no idea what most of these things were as a child but I do remember her getting hopped up about Priscilla Presley being on Dallas and her always reminding me that she had listened to As the World Turns and The Guiding Light on the radio with her mother, Nana.
I’m telling you, each room means so much. I never slept in the twin bed room upstairs, but I’ll always think of that as Josh and Caleb’s room. And I’ll always know that the lock to that door was broken because me as a 2 or 3 year old accidentally locked myself in and couldn’t figure out how to unlock it. I barely remember sitting on the other side of the bed (whose bedspread never changed) and my Gandaddy busting the door down and the lock never working right since.
The double bed room was the room that I slept in growing up til I upgraded to Ganny’s old room when I married Mike. There was many a night that I would stay up until the wee hours of the morning reading a book until I finished it. Ganny never complained or scolded me about that, because a lot of my love of reading had to do with me seeing her read ALL the time. Seriously, all the time. I remember the rattly old windows as the wind would blow and thinking oh my goodness, something is going to get me.
I remember Ganny’s upstairs room where, when it was still her room, I didn’t really go into it very often. It was a little intimidating. You knew if you moved something or put something out of place, she would definitely notice. Her crystal jewelry boxes, one with a donkey and one with a swan on them and her perfumes all laid out. I have no idea why one was a donkey and one a swan. This may be a little gross, but I’ll also never forget her showing me this stain beside her bedside table where I had thrown up one time as a child and her not saying, well that really is terrible because you messed up my blue carpet, but her saying it matter of factly and almost as if she was proud that it was there because she saw not just the good and clean and nice with us but also the real and sick and wild with us.
When I think about the house and the “things” I might like to have from it, most of them are architectural. Gandaddy restored this late 1800’s house and there are so many pieces of it that could never be replaced. The huge fireplace in the middle of the great room, the steps that served as a stage, a boat, a runway, all sorts of things, the wrap around porch where we played for hours on the hammock, the church benches, and the rocking chairs. All of these things made this house something different.
Some of the stuff I cherish is long gone now. The “train” of old bus seats that Gandaddy mounted to trailers to cart us around through the woods on a mini tractor seeing “Godwin Land” with Touchdown Teddy and a statue of Mary among other things. The bus that Gandaddy gutted and added army bunk beds, a tv, chairs, and the most random assortment of odds and ends imaginable – a white clay hand, bowling ball, old telephone. We played for countless hours in that bus. These things aren’t there any more and neither is the swing in the grape orchard, but they’re still right there in my mind.
You see, as much as I love that house, and don’t think I don’t, what makes a house a home is the people inside it. What makes this house special, or at least to me more special than a lot of them, was that Gandaddy and Ganny infused it with their love. It’s felt in every piece of wood or tile on the island in the kitchen. Even in all the complaining Ganny did about getting her “new” kitchen. Have mercy! It’s felt in every one of Ganny’s sometimes prissy decor choices – liked the fringed curtains in the great room. This house is not just any house, but love seeps out. I’ll never forget at the visitation for my grandfather Ganny telling people, that these grandchildren weren’t just the apple of their Gandaddy’s eyes, they were his very eye balls. (I know that sounds sort of strange but that’s how Ganny was and how she said it.)
So I don’t know who will get what. And I don’t know what I will do when we start moving things out. There’s a part of me that wants to just remember it as it was and not step a toenail back. I can’t imagine seeing some of those rooms empty and I’m glad that Dad is taking pictures now for us to remember and I’m thankful for Lindsay’s pictures of the cotton that she gave us at Christmas and the pictures Karen and Guyeth took of the family all together. There’s a part of me that knows that the love in that house, is just a piece or a glimmer of the home that awaits, where we’ll all be gathered just as crazy and off kilter as ever. Both the wonderful Godwin-Burch-Moore clan and the equally as memorable and hilarious McClendon-Jackson clan. I keep thinking of the line in Steven Curtis Chapman’s song, “We are not home yet.” That great cloud of witnesses may have grown over the past years, but they’re all here in our midst!
We may not be home yet, but I think we can help create a little bit of home everywhere we go. If we open our hearts and our homes to those around us offering, sharing, giving, than we will experience God in more ways than we can count. That’s part of what made their home, home. You never knew who would stop by, from former students (both public educators) to the amazing folks of Greeleyville UMC to family whether blood or bond. You knew there would be hospitality and almost all the time laughter and stories. You see, their legacy was not just this house or this furniture or this land, but their’s was all the people they loved and all the lives they touched.
I hope that whether we have the physical Ganny’s as true north anymore or not, that we share our homes, that we treasure our times with our loved ones, and that we pick up and carry forth the legacy.
I’m finally starting to wind down to fall asleep. Wohoo! But I leave you with these questions – where is home for you? What does home mean to you? What makes you feel at home? How do we share that with others?
This song always makes me think of all of the granparents and wise elders we have lost – including my beloved and always candid and cracked McClendon family. I am grateful for the tremendous legacy left to each of us on both sides of the family.
I’ve always enjoyed this song. Even though it’s more romantic in nature, you can get the sense or “feeling” of the enveloping love in it.
Last night during the Ash Wednesday service there were many funny occasions as I caught Erica (our volunteer sign language translator extraordinaire) giving me and others looks like – what!!? how am I supposed to translate that???. But one thought-provoking moment stood out. She had asked Mary earlier in the evening what the sign for the word forgiven is and so when I said as part of the liturgy, “In the name of Jesus Christ, you are forgiven” she thought she nailed it. The irony came when she found out afterwards that the sign she was doing was punished not forgiven. Mary of course knew what she meant and I am as always hugely grateful that Erica puts up with us, but I’ve been chuckling and musing about this since last night.
In the name of Jesus Christ, you are punished.
This morning at Wesley we hosted a district meeting for the clergy and Kathy James our Congregational Specialist talked about generational divides and opportunities for our churches. How do we minister to all of these different groups and spek their language in the midst? We talked a lot about images. We could easily recognize the logos from products or stores whether there were words or not. We’re a visual society and the shorthand that our communication has become in many ways has bled over into the images that we see and know even if the actual writing is explicit or not.
Then came the wise question of what image or icon or logo does the church have? How does society recognize us? The cross and flame wasn’t mentioned although I do think that’s one of the images for the UMC, but do people on the outside actually get that? The cross in general, buddy Jesus, a traditional picture of a church, a pair of hands praying….none of those came to mind for us this morning discussing it. What our motley crew worried about was that the image people might have of Christians right now is of people protesting funerals or others condemning and judging people. So seriously, what would our logo/image/picture/icon be?
When I think of the “In the name of Jesus Christ, you are punished,” I can’t help but think of some of those images and icons that people may recognize us by. Are they images of hate? Are they images of middle class complacency? Are they images of frowny faced people in suits and Sunday dresses? What do you think?
I was happy to see people sporting their ashes on ESPN and Colbert last night. There’s a fun witness. Will you watch them differently? Hold them to a different standard? Expect more? I had no problem taking the students to IHOP last night while we were still “ashed,” but I must admit, that it did give me pause about how we acted or how we were perceived by the folks working there or others eating. When we have that sign/image/icon of the cross on our foreheads, people are watching. We know people can see it. We represent something and someOne when we wear our faith.
In our every day, we don’t wake up every morning and put our cross on our forehead. Heck, the Matthew passage last night (Matthew 6:1-6, 16-21) actually speaks out against practicing your piety before others and I completely agree. I’m not saying you go stockpile ashes to begin this process every morning, but I am saying we shouldn’t just try to “act right” or live out our faith just when we have the sign of the cross on our heads. We should dig deeper and show the world by our words, our acts, and our love that in the name of Jesus Christ they are FORGIVEN. This crazy thing called Christianity is not a battle for Super Christian of the ages, but it’s a recognition that we can’t do it all by ourselves. It’s a knowledge that we mess up, boy do we sometimes, but that there is One who walks with us and gives us new life.
This forgiveness is available for each of us whether rich or poor, black or brown, lefty or righty, insider or outsider. It’s a free gift unlike the Clinique bags that get quickly given out to the first wave of customers. This is a free gift that never runs out and doesn’t expire.
So on this day after Ash Wednesday when our crosses have been washed away, what remains of our commitment to repentance and renewal? What does God have in store for us this season? What kind of visual do we as Christians offer the world?
If you could pick a universal picture or image to represent the church what would it be? (No this is not a branding meeting where we’re going to put millions of dollars in and take the airwaves, but I’m curious as to what you name.) Punishment or forgiveness? Peace or hate? I’m not saying that all of our images will be pretty or nice or clean, because I don’t believe that being the body of Christ is all roses and butterflies. But I am saying that the images we project need to be real and they need to reflect the Gospel, not just what we’ve made it into.
this is every worship picture these days...wowzers...
Kathy Bostrom, wise woman that she is posted to her facebook status, “I never have given up something for Lent. Instead, I try to add one more prayer, one more act of kindness, one more word of grace, one more way of being the Love of God for God’s children. Join me?”
I loved that sentiment. It reminded me of Jars of Clay’s song, “Small Rebellions.” If we spent our days doing these small rebellions what a world it would be. If we intentionally practiced this, not just for Lent, but for always – wowzers what could happen?
God of the break and shatter
Hearts in every form still matter
In our weakness help us see
That alone we’ll never be
Lifting any burdens off our shoulders
If our days could be filled with small rebellions
Senseless, brutal acts of kindness from us all
If we stand between the fear and firm foundation
Push against the current and the fall
The current and the fall
God of the warn and tattered
All of Your people matter
Give us more than words to speak
Cause we are hearts and arms that reach
And love climbs up and down the human ladder
Give us days to be filled with small rebellions
Senseless, brutal acts of kindness from us all
If we stand between the fear and firm foundation
Push against the current and the fall
The current and the fall
The fall
We will never walk alone again
No, we will never walk alone again
No, we will never walk alone again
Give us days to be filled with small rebellions
Senseless, brutal acts of kindness from us all
If we stand between the fear and firm foundation
Push against the current and the fall
Give us days to be filled with small rebellions
Senseless, brutal acts of kindness from us all
If we stand between the fear and firm foundation
Push against the current and the fall
The current and the fall
Since Monday I’ve been having some back pain. When you have fibromyalgia and you have two toddlers that you may or may not pick up all the time, it’s not all that surprising to have some aches and pain. Generally I would just think no big deal but, I couldn’t sleep last night and ended up having a fitful night of sleep on my back. I never, ever sleep on my back. Yep, I feel like I’m whining now, and on Ash Wednesday no less.
I’m preaching the Ash Wednesday sermon tonight at a local church and the students are tagging along with me. One of our students is hearing impaired and she and her amazing interpreter, one of our other students are both coming tonight. Erica (the interpreter) was excited about going until I told her I was preaching. Just kidding…a bit. She knows that I talk fast and my hands are always moving and trying to interpret with my randomness is an exercise in and of itself. She asked if I could give her some notes about what I’m preaching on. That’s fair, right?
But all I can think about is this dull and sometimes sharp ache in my back. It is driving me crazy today. To dust we will become, heck – we’re already beginning to fall apart and feel like that dust sometimes. As much as this distracts me from work, having a coherent conversation with someone, actually being pastoral or even listening at all at this point, I think about all those that deal every day with a dull or sharp pain. This pain is not always physical, but often emotional, spiritual, psychological, really real. We each carry around past hurts or wounds. We each have moments of uncertainty, fear, and doubt in the midst of painful situations or the reminders of those painful situations.
I get that. I think that’s a great focus this season to let go of some of those voices, some of that negativity. I love that intentionality and purpose of reminding oneself repeatedly that there is someone greater that you belong to, respond to, and answer to – not just some voice inside your head.
If this Ash Wednesday brings a day that marks the beginning of a season of repentance and spiritual renewal, then we have to ask ourselves the hard questions. I love some of the ones that Rachel Held Evans lifts up in her blog, http://rachelheldevans.com/40-ideas-for-lent-2011. What do we need to repent from? What consistently stands in our way to feel the freedom of Christ? What voices or people or hurts or situations have held us back from that abundant life? What are those fears and doubts that we can let go and repentant of during this season? How can we move closer and closer to that freedom, even if it means making hard choices and decisions?
And then drawing towards that spiritual renewal, how can we be more intentional in our drawing closer to God? Does that mean giving up facebook, or does that mean we’re intentional and Christ-centered when we post, comment or spend time on facebook? Just like this blog (http://penelopepiscopal.blogspot.com/2011/03/are-you-christian-giving-up-social.html) writes, I’d hate for Christians to stop shining their lights during a season when the world needs to hear and know the power of repentance and also resurrection.
Don't go with the tag line, but how many of us go through life distracted by the next shiny object in front of us? Or are we grounded and focused in the midst. (Not trying to take out all spontaneity but you get the point.)
In a recent column in Entertainment Weekly, Mark Harris writes a piece called “Taking Multitasking to Task.” I loved it. It really spoke to me in profound ways about how we’re living this world in which doing everything is expected and when you don’t it’s frowned upon. For some of us, instead of diving into the hard stuff, the more difficult, the more challenging, we’ll keep consuming a lot of the easier or more fluff things, just so that we can do a gazillion things at once and say that we’re connected and on top of things. For some of us, trying to be all places for all people is easier when we skim the surface and don’t take time to listen, reflect, discern and really meet with people or God. Maybe y’all don’t relate to that. He closes his piece with, “I have friends who’ve recently taken their own steps toward reclaiming control–one is trying internet-free Sundays; another has sworn off texting while in the presence of actual human beings. So, in that spirit, this year I plan to hold to the principle that half of my focus is always the wrong amount–that someitmes the TV can go off, or the laptop can be put away, or Google can wait. I’m going to try to undivide my attention, and see if my entertainment choices (and my thoughts about them) get any sharper as a result. It couldn’t hurt. Well, that’s a lie. The scary thing is, it hurts already.” He’s talking about entertainment, but there’s a part of Lent in there for me.
What do we give our full attention? A more pertinent question to me probably – do I ever give anything my full attention? Are we running through our to do lists for the day when we do our morning devotion or are our minds in ten different places as we’re working on our sermons or our small groups or our Sunday school classes? What gets our full attention?
When I look at how these 40 days are supposed to be a time of Spiritual Renewal, I have to ask myself honestly where my attention and focus will be and how I’m going to invite the Spirit to lead me and guide me in the disciplines or the actions that will be undertaken. If I’m doing it, just to have an answer when someone asks me what I’m giving up or adding for Lent, then that’s rubbish.
There’s something that he said at the end of the article. He says, “The scary thing is, it hurts already.” I’m not saying we beat ourselves up for Lent and what we give up or add shouldn’t be a contest for who is the most devout Christian (although I do wonder how many viewers that tv show would get week to week.) We need to discern where we are. We need to focus our attention on the Word of God and see what will help draw us towards repentance and renewal and go with it – with the grace, mercy, leading and strength of One who knows us far better than we even know ourselves.
Two things I’ll leave you with. There some of my favorite things to use during Lent. The first is from Jan Richardson’s In Wisdom’s Path. She says, “The season begins with ashes and invites us into a time of stripping away all that distracts us from recognizing the God who dwells at our core. Reminding us that we are ashes and dust, God beckons us during Lent to consider what is elemental and essential in our lives. As a season of preparation for the mysteries of death and resurrection, it is a stark season.” Hopefully it’s not just a stark season – something different than normal – but a rich season.
Roberta Porter is one of my most favorite writers for Alive Now, she writes in her prayer,
Broken Open
Culture’s message is immediate
fulfillment, gratification.
But when I hungrily seek control
in my power, with my plans,
I am full, brimming over
with empty calories,
and strangely unfulfilled.
I pray to be broken open – unafraid
of change – and pour out pride.
My Spirit fast teaches me
as I am willing to yield,
more space for grace appears,
and more of Christ,
Bread of Life,
is revealed.
When the ashes are put upon our heads either this morning, midday, tonight, may we remember that we are dust and to dust we will become again and may we take the days and months and years ahead to focus and retreat to the One who goes before us, beside us, and sometimes even pushing us to grasp hold of this thing called abundant life.
One last one, because I love this one too. Also from Alive Now the March/April 2001 edition…
Quiet Day Retreat
To be quiet, both without and within —
to welcome silence and space
and unbroken meditation.
I have not given up food
— the typical fast —
but I’ve emptied my mind
for an hour, or a day.
I’ve overturned it like a bowl,
forbidding entry of my plans, my chores.
Then come thoughts and reflections,
then come inspiration
and then I can return refreshed
to the frantic daily world.
What sort of fast is this?
A fast from calendars, schedules, from self-important busyness.
One of our small groups is reading Shane Claiborne’s Irresistible Revolution right now and it has brought about a lot of interesting discussion. I often feel like I’m defending young adults to the church and the church to young adults. As someone who was nourished and formed in the United Methodist Church who has seen the good, the bad, the ugly and the awesome as a preacher’s kid, and as someone who has felt called to lead and be apart of this church, there’s part of me that wants to defend it until I’m blue in the face. At our recent small group talking about the book, it was me and another student who is a PK who were defending the established church in the face of students that don’t necessarily align themselves with a particular denomination or group, but are serious about their spirituality. And before some of you reading think, that it’s just young people that feel that way, it’s not. Yesterday we had someone stop by Wesley giving us a donation to help with painting and repairing some of our windows around the building. Is this guy a United Methodist? Nope. Had I ever met him before? Nope. Was he young guy? Nope. He simply said he didn’t really believe in all the denominations but that he was a Christian and he wanted to help us out by doing the repairs and help the guy doing the work out, by giving him some work in this hard economy. There’s something about some of our denominational structures that people find intimidating or they’re just mistrusting. Who can blame them?
In a world where not just young people, but many relate sincerely to the statement, “I’m spiritual, not religious,” what role do we play as the church? There’s something about living out our faith and actions that speak louder than words that my students and many of us find refreshing in books like Shane Claiborne’s. Even the biggest of mega churches are starting to realize, you have to have that service and outreach component for people to buy in to what you’re offering. I’m not at all saying that our older generations aren’t socially conscious and don’t where their faith on their sleeves. Quite the contrary. I see the amazing folks of Bethel UMC rocking the soup kitchen week after week. I see many of our “great generation” as Tom Brokaw calls it, being the ones that give to our churches, to our missions, and to our campus ministries with their time and money. These folks are our bedrock. They are our foundation. We have relied upon them in our attendance, giving, and mission reports for years and years. I honestly have no idea what our church is going to look like a decade from now.
For years I’ve heard people rally around sayings like, “Our young people aren’t the future of the church but are the church today.” I also have heard very clearly that in the next ten or twenty years our church is going to change radically. At a recent District Superintendent gathering of the SEJ, Lovett Weems talked about a “tsunami of death” expected to happen by 2018. A new body is going to have to step up. Even more than that, a collective body needs to be formed and shaped and nourished as we go into this new territory together. And it needs to be something new…and thank God we believe in One that makes all things new. What worked in the 50’s and 60’s in our hayday is not going to work now.
I think most people would agree that we want our churches to have young people. I can’t imagine anyone actually admitting out loud in front of people that they really don’t want to give up their space or their community or that they want to keep it solely theirs and nobody else’s. Most people would also probably agree that we don’t really want to see our average age of clergy or congregant creep any higher. We want these young people to join our churches, but how often do we really try to plug them in to the life and leadership of the church? We think that a college Sunday school class is the answer to everything, like somehow these young adults are going to smell this addition out in the atmosphere or its like batman’s bat light is going to shine forth from that particular church and young adults will automatically flock to it.
I hear pastors say that campus ministry is a great place for college students and young adults but it’s hard to get them invested back in our local churches. You’re right about that. It is hard for young adults that have been fed, nourished, and empowered in campus ministries to go back to local churches where they don’t always feel heard or like they matter except in the “we really want you here because you’re young, but we don’t want to give you any kind of say-so over anything.” It’s not that you should be pandering to young adults or any one else in this consumerist crowd, but if some of the keys of the kingdom aren’t gently handed over it’s going to be hard to pry them out of the cold dead hands of our churches a decade from now.
So what does this mean for us? Where can we go from here? How do we bridge this divide?
A wise beyond words former student of mine posted this on facebook in reaction to some of the assumptions in the Call to Action report. This quote comes from the top of the page talking about vital congregations (http://www.umc.org/atf/cf/%7Bdb6a45e4-c446-4248-82c8-e131b6424741%7D/PROPOSEDVITALCONGREGATIONSPLANNINGGUIDE-2-14-11%20(2)%20(2).PDF) “The United Methodist Church is called to be a world leader in developing existing churches and starting new vital congregations so that we make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.” Then he writes, “But what if we’re not? How do we know? How do we know we’re not called to repent of our sin of desiring worldly influence that has resulted in our church functioning to bolster war, imperialism, eugenics, and the like over the past two centuries? How do we know we aren’t called to use all our buildings to feed the hungry and house the homeless? How do we know we’re not meant to shrink and become even more marginal before our comfortable church learns what being the body of Christ is about? I’m unimpressed with the presumed triumphalism.” I want to give a huge amen and shout a loud PREACH BROTHER!
Yes, things are changing. And like I said before, I have no idea what the church is going to look like in the next 10 – 15 years, but instead of being sad and angry and depressed and bitter and cynical as is so easily slipped into, why don’t we intentionally pray, discern and vision, call on the Spirit to lead, get totally excited about the possibilities of what can happen if we let the old paradigms fall away and we revision anew. A “revision” of a paper, isn’t writing the whole thing over again, even though some paragraphs and parts, some sentences and words, sometimes even some of the critical parts are tweaked, corrected, and changed. We don’t have to throw the whole thing out, but we do have to imagine again what this church is called to do and to be in this world and what that means for us.
This is representative of where we are in campus ministry right now, trying to offer the Good News in the midst of people being pulled in different directions, trying to articulate that “church” isn’t just always those brick and mortar buildings with the steeple but that it can be community and justice and discipleship and nourishment too. As we stand on the precipice of something that’s going to change and happen whether we like it or not, we need to all be intentional in our prayer, in the Gospel that we share, in the asking of the Spirit to lead and guide us in ways that we can’t even imagine. These aren’t times to be afraid or hold even tighter to our fear and control, but this is an exciting time in the life of our larger faith community. How are we going to set the tone? How are we going to shape the conversation through the power of the Spirit? How are we going to step out in faith? What do we keep and what needs pruning?
I don’t know about y’all, but I haven’t decided what I’m adding or giving up to help me draw closer to God during this Lenten season yet. I still have til tomorrow night so I’m fine. I’ve heard of pastors intentionally praying for everyone in their congregation – love that idea or adding times of fasting and prayer. I think though one of the things that I would like to do and I would like my students to do, is to pray for our church. And not just little c church, but also big c Church. Instead of watching all of this unfold and getting swept to and fro in the midst, why don’t we actually ask the Spirit to steer the ship and blow and move? Why don’t we ask for guidance and discernment and illuminating instruction to be given to our church leaders, those lovely people we call the bureaucrats of the church, and not just them but to all of us – lay and clergy alike? Would you care enough about the present/future of our church to intentionally pray for 40 days? Do you think it’s inevitable doom and gloom or is there hope in the midst? I choose hope. And I choose to pray. And I choose to believe that God will shock our socks off with all that’s in store. We’re right on the edge of a powerful movement. The signs are there. It could happen. We can choose to see this as a wonderful opportunity or as the last death nail….let’s choose life.
Evy and Enoch at a recent youth event...what will the Church look like when they're young adults?
The only way my camera took a decent picture was in the shadow...
We have some daffodils that appear about this time every year. Some might think they actually look kind of pitiful. They’re the only flowers that we have planted anywhere on the Wesley or Wesley House property and trust me when I say that we don’t do anything “special” for them to appear every year. The first year I was here, I noticed them and thought what a blessing they were that spring. Nice, bright and yellow flowers that suddenly just appeared. Now after watching them bloom for five years, watching them just appear out of nowhere in our bare flower beds, I am so thankful to see them. It amazes me that we haven’t had to do any work to keep them or make them bloom. We just get to enjoy them!
It reminds me very much of the text this past Sunday from Matthew talking about the flowers that neither spin nor toil and the birds of the air and how if God can clothe them so beautifully, how much more can God take care of each of us. (Matthew 6:24-34) Never more than seeing those daffodils today have I felt the glory and peace in that text. No amount of miracle grow or extra water made these daffodils so beautiful – they just are. So even in the midst of the most trying or worrisome of times, may we enjoy and bask in the sunlight of the One who created us and who brings us new life every day. May we trust that we will be provided for and that we just need to trust, hold on, and enjoy exactly where we are!
What are some things that we worry about?
Do you ever go about your day and suddenly you’re in a worried or stressed mood and you’re like – what happened? What changed? Often I find that if I look back to what started this “worry cycle,” it was something that pricked my own fear or discouragement. By figuring out what started it and giving that to God, it’s easier to move on and not let the things that we can’t control or the things that seek to hurt us, have any power in our lives.
We look to the birds, even the crazy seagulls, geese, and ducks at Winthrop lake, and we know that God provides. I look to these daffodils that miraculously appear offering the promise of Spring and that extra burst of joy even in the midst.
What are some of the beautiful things in your life that God has blessed you with? What happens when we worry? How can God speak to us in the midst?
So with the beautiful bright sunlight, for some reason this is how my camera took a picture of the daffodils. Wowzers!
It’s that time in the semester when the students are getting really stressed out. Have you ever wondered why they phrase is stressed “out” and not stressed “in”? Yes if the stress starts leaking everywhere, it’s eventually going to come out, but there’s so much inward affect that stress has on us. Facing challenging, difficult, and overwhelming situations from every direction can take a huge toll on a person and as the “prayer” section of Winthrop Wesley’s prayers and praises notebook seems to heartily begin to outweigh the praises you know people are starting to feel down and discouraged.
Around this midterm time it can feel like when it rains it pours. It seems that when things begin to get hard, the difficulty sometimes can grow exponentially. A couple weeks ago, we looked at Deuteronomy 30:15-20 and I feel like some of the themes in that text are cropping up all over the place. God clearly lays out two courses – two ways in which life can go and God asks for us to “Choose life.”
Choose life even when things seem out of control or insurmountable. Choose life even when there’s no way things could in a million years work out. Choose life even when by all logic in this world there aren’t easy or clear answers. A pastor colleague of mine who frequently amuses and challenges me with his facebook statuses, posted this earlier today, “I watched some news this evening. I watched FOX, MSNBC and CNN. The message I got? We’re doomed. There is no hope. Pack up your kids and head to the hills. Empty your bank account and hide your money under the mattress. Stock up your shelves. Be afraid, very afraid. And Justin Beiber made the cover of Rolling Stone. Yep, the world is coming to an end!”
I didn’t know whether to laugh or crawl under the bed myself. I admit that I have caught a little “Bieber fever” in that I enjoyed his Glee episode and some of the songs are quite annoyingly catchy, but I’m not watching the movie. That’s neither here nor there. His status was another reminder of very much what the world gives us. We’re doomed. There is no hope. It’s like one of the Charlotte local news networks that Mike and I refuse to watch because the guy always seems so happy when something really awful has happened and he gets to report on it. I know you’ve got to sell the news but do you have to be so gleeful about an awful car accident or shooting or fire?
There’s a lot in our world that says yep, we’re doomed. It actually would be a lot easier to say that in a lot of ways. You don’t really have to work to bring about change and transformation when the world tells you it’s a waste of time. What’s the point?
But is that the way of faith? Is that the way of the cross? Or more significantly – the way of an Easter – resurrection people? Is that the follow up of the verse – “Choose life so that you and our descendants may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and holding fast to him; for that means life to you and length of days, so that you may live in the land that the Lords swore to give your ancestors to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob.” It’s not just choose life. It’s not just choose to believe in the bright side, the cup half full, the silver lining. It’s not just reject the negativity that we all know is contagious, the complaining and criticism that does harm and not a bit of good, the spiraling of fear and angst that has no end. It’s choose life that you may live – loving God, obeying God, and holding fast to God even when all may seem lost or today feels about as cruddy as it can get. It very clearly reminds us that Jesus said he came to bring us abundant li
What does the word abundance conjure up for you? Abundance is enough for everyone. It’s more than enough. It’s awesome. It’s bountiful. A bountiful life.
Is it hard to believe this sometimes? Yes. Heck yes. We got word on Friday that Mike’s 2 year old cousin, Lachlan, who was born with some heart defects and has already experienced heart surgeries, now has a brain tumor. The neurosurgeon would like to operate and the family is meeting with the cardiologist this Friday for approval of the surgery. I can’t imagine what Leslie and Cullen are going through in these days as they await these appointments. There aren’t any words or platitudes or anything that can sermonize that or make it go away and be all right.
There’s that choosing though even in the midst. And sometimes we can’t make the choice on our own. Sometimes it takes a community of faith, a family of strength, a body of believers united in hope to help us continue to choose life. There are good days and there are bad. Sometimes it means that we need to cut out some of the negative – whether a toxic situation, person, or past hurt or wound that we haven’t given to God. Sometimes it’s not letting our fears or our worries rob us of the joy of today. We have to make the conscious choice to step away, turn off the news sometime or change the channel of our hearts and life. There are days when I know and feel and rest in the promises of God for the life that each of us is given and there are days when I get on Wikipedia and start the worry spin cycle of why’s and what if’s and let me tell you – that path leads nowhere good, productive, or very positive. That’s where that holding fast to God comes in. Holding fast to that peace that transcends all understanding, holding fast to the hope and strength that only God can give, and holding fast to someone that can give us more comfort and love than anyone else. We will hold fast to the promises of God.
I’m not saying that we all walk around as Pollyanna’s because life is real and it hurts and it really is scary sometimes. The key is going back to the Source of life – to the Creator that knows our hurts and the things that keep us up at night and even the things that we don’t want to say outloud. May we in the coming days and weeks and times of uncertainty or chaos or stressed out to the max, find ways to ground ourselves in the power of the One who ignites, breathes and drenches us in new life and hope each and every day.
How will you choose life today?
Yes this is beyond cheesy in some ways and pretty old, but definitely goes with the text – Big Tent Revival’s “Choose Life”:
Do you get frustrated when things don’t go the way you think they should? Or even more than that, do you feel frustrated when people consistently don’t live up to expectations or react in ways that you feel are hurtful or uncaring or selfish or self-centered? There’s such a balance in giving grace to people and loving them as who they are and holding people accountable and really encouraging growth. Jesus gave us an awesome example with that, but wowzers is it hard to figure out how to live that.
When someone messes up it would be really easy just to ignore it or get over it or forget about what has happened, and of course there are times and places for that, but if we’re talking about Christian community – it is not okay to shut people down, to take things for granted, to not welcome folks, to constantly talk about inside jokes that keep people on the outside, to belittle and criticize in ways that are far from constructive and are much more destructive. Negativity is so contagious. And for some reason instead of the church being in sharp contrast to that, it seems that it’s easier for it to happen here than not.
At our district clergy meeting on Thursday we talked a bit about the challenges and hostile environment that some encounter. In a conversation with a colleague about the church politics of the church kitchen, it amazed me how territorial, rude, and close-minded people can be when they’re the ones on the inside/part of the club and someone else is looking in. And if you think that “we’ve never done it that way before” is a phrase just used in local churches and not campus ministries, I wish you were right – but sadly, it’s not the case. I think back on my dad’s talking about what it takes to get to real community – the chaos and conflict involved – and I get that. But can’t we be different? Or at least can we try to not be as self-centered and hostile as the rest of the world? How can we worship and have solid fellowship with someone on a church retreat or on Sunday mornings and then turn around and not speak to them in the aisle at the grocery store or the local Target? It’s so unbelievingly frustrating.
Not that I’m the “are you being a good enough Christian” police? Not by any means. It actually usually make me wonder if I have been a bad “shepherd.” Do we as pastors really lead by example? And what is that example? Yep I know we are called to offer God’s love to everyone. I get that. But I also don’t remember Jesus talking to the Pharisees in a lot of flowery rainbows and butterflies language. Sometimes it was harsh and hard to hear. He was straight up with them. This thing – this discipleship – is not just about insiders. This is not just a club for you that have figured out how this things work – when to stand for the apostle’s creed or sit for the prayer or whatever. This isn’t about who can complain and criticize and attack people the most because you think you have the inside track or power. This isn’t about who has the most friends or knows the most gossip. This isn’t even about the pastors, the singers, the musicians, the people in charge. This is about something different. Thank goodness!
Our theme verse for Wesley this year comes from 1 John 3:17-18 from The Message, “If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something abot it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God’s love? It disappears. And you made it disappear. My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love.” I really like the text. But it’s really scary to put that on all the Wesley shirts and the posters because if we put that out there and if people walk in and they’re not welcomed and people keep to themselves and are doing their own thing – it’s a bit of a contradiction, right? A sort of significant one.
How do we practice real love? How do we live that out? As pastors or leaders in the church, how do we not take it personally when this is such a challenge in our congregation? Are they “getting” anything that we are saying or are people tuning in and out and just not catching on? Maybe. Or maybe we’re lacking in our preaching and teaching. Could be. Do you at some point say forget numbers, forget statistics, forget all of the nit-picking – we are going to try to live out this love of Christ and the heck with the rest of it?
As you might read between the lines, it’s been a pretty frustrating week. And discernment and reflection in the midst of being tired makes things all the more personal, hurtful, and accentuated. But the scripture this morning from the Upper Room was a good word in terms of where we are,
“Seek the LORD while he may be found, call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake their way, and the unrighteous their thoughts; let them return to the LORD, that he may have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return there until they have watered the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and succeed in the thing for which I sent it.
For you shall go out in joy, and be led back in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall burst into song, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall be to the LORD for a memorial, for an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.”
-Isaiah 55:6-13 (NRSV)
You know what that tells me? That sometimes we just don’t know. It’s not about us or our ways or what we’re doing or not doing. God’s purposes are being carried out. God is sowing seeds all around us. We can prepare the bread, but the yeast is what mysteriously makes it rise. I don’t think that lets people off the hook in terms of how we are to be in the world if we claim to be disciples of Christ – not by any means. But I do think that God says that God is bigger than all of that. God will work, and is working in spite of all of us folks that mess it up. It’s not about us – at least not all about us. That is a relief. Even if we’re expecting a bunch of thorns (and it sure feels like that sometimes in ministry), there will come a cypress. A couple of those would be pretty awesome!
So yes things may be frustrating when they don’t move or grow or change or act according to what we may think is right. True. And I may expect a heck of a lot out of people when I may not have a right to – remember that whole plank in your own eye thing. But before I throw the baby out with the bathwater. Before we sit down and say all is lost – it’s good to know even when I don’t measure up or when I feel like I must be the most gigantic hypocritical mess of them all – God is in the mix – bringing beauty from ashes. May we seek and know God and be challenged to live it out. For real. Not just kidding or just during small group or children’s sermon or Sunday school or Disciple group or on a retreat. We are called to live out this love all the time – a la Wesley’s – “Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can.”
When you claim you’re a Christian whether saying it, wearing it, on your car, whatever – you’ve got to back it up. We’re not all going to be “perfect” all the time but that beauty of sanctification is that we don’t have to constantly stay in the low pit of negative, critical, spin cycle of sin. Change can happen. And God still moves. Even in the midst.
Just last week I was talking about the beautiful weather and now we’ve been in a week of rain. I was listening to Carole King’s “Beautiful” earlier and in it she talks about reflecting in how you look, how you feel on the inside. We know the research about how even when you’ve had a really cruddy day, there’s something about smiling, something about laughing, that can make a dark day seem a little brighter. Turn that frown upside down, if you will. If all of us reflect the love that we feel than what a world that would be. I don’t think that means we walk around like Stepford Wives or people smiling and fake all the time. Far from it. I hope that it means that in the midst of us being real, we realize how blessed we are and how thankful we should be, and that the joy inside that we feel will bubble out from us. If we are living as grace-filled people that have been given this new life, the very breath we breathe, than that should be reflected in the love and thanksgiving that we show the world. So on this very cloudy yucky day, may we be thankful for both the little things we sometimes take for granted (running water, flowers, food, clothing) and the big things (getting to go to school, opportunities to learn and grow, a gift of wisdom, thought, discourse, dialogue). Let’s rock it on from the inside to the outside and back again! Not fake it to make it, but let our guards down to let the laughter and smiles of our hearts flow.
Blessings on the Journey 
